The worst days of our lives
by Mediocrity89
Summary: When Draco is released from Azkaban, he has to face the consequences of his actions with a parole bracelet around his ancle. Meanwhile Harry and Hermione are defintely hiding something from Ron and Ginny and something's not quite right with Blaise...
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

Draco fidgeted with his sleeve, slipping it between his fingers and releasing it again. The clicking of boots on the cold stone floor echoed through the empty hallway. In front of him and behind him walked four aurors. He was nervous. He was finally getting out. Finally he could leave the draughty cell, the smelly inmates and tasteless food behind him.

Azkaban had never looked better, now that Draco knew that he never had to see it again. Even though Azkaban had seen worse times. It used to be a shitty hellhole. Now it was a dignified hellhole, with clean cells, warm bed linen in the winter, and half way decent food. That did not stop Draco's sentence from being absolutely horrific.

As they passed another row of cells, Draco heard cheering.

'You're getting out Malfoy? Lucky bastard, bet your dad bought you out, didn't he? It was lovely having you here,' sneered an eerie familiar voice.

Laughter rung from two different cells, followed by a wolf whistle. Draco did not react. He merely blinked once, kept his head down and kept on walking.

'Mudblood.'

Draco swallowed, uncomfortable with the truth in his statement. He knew it wasn't fair, he did have some sort of moral compass, twisted as it was, but he would give his entire inheritance to get out of here.

'Ignore them,' commanded an auror behind him, 'there we are. Just walk through the gate. Yeah, like that. Now turn around, put your hands behind your head.'

Draco stepped through the gate, turned around and put his hands behind his head. He could not see what the auror behind him was doing but suddenly he felt someone yanking up his trouser leg. The cold sea air hit his skin like a sledgehammer. He had almost forgotten how cold Azkaban really was without decent clothes.

The auror clasped a cool metal device around his ankle.

'What the hell is this?' Draco asked wiggling his ankle around..

'That what we call, or actually them Muggles do, a parole bracelet. It's a magical device will keep an eye on you and any shady business you might have . You will be monitored 24 hours a day for an entire year. The full 365 days, 52 weeks and 12 months. Now, I know you know the rules, but here they are again. Protocol you know?' The auror shrugged and unrolled a scroll. 'You will be allowed two weeks at home, to get reconnected, or whatever they want to call that shit, with your parents and any friends you may have left. After those two weeks, on September the first, you will go back to Hogwarts for your final year. We'll be keeping an eye out for you, no going to Hogsmeade, no getting of the Hogwarts grounds. No getting into fights, you are only allowed to use your wand inside the classroom or in a life of death situation. Study, study, that's all you're going to do. It's the first year that Hogwarts opening again and no-one, I repeat, no-one will fuck this up. Not you, none of your death eater or 'neutral' friends. Are we clear?'

Draco swallowed.

'Crystal clear.'

******

Hermione sat in the Burrow, legs crossed, all prim and proper. The couch was getting rather uncomfortable after a sit this long. The boys were having the time of their lives, recalling old stories about Fred, George and Umbridge.

'That last bit of fireworks, man that was a blast. I've never seen a pink toad run that fast. Come to think of it, I had never seen her run at all. Fat menace," Ron said, merrily swinging his butterbeer from left to right.

It was great to see them all having such fun again, it took quite a while before the sound of laughter rung through the Burrow again after the war. It had been hard on anyone. It was great to see Wood dragging George from his depression after Fred's murder. He had been a basket case for months. Nobody seemed to be able to reach him, he just locked himself in their old room, not talking at all, barely eating. They all tried, granted, they all tried to lure him out of it, but George would have none of it. But the most frightening thing was, he didn't crack a smile for seven months. George and not laughing is as likely as Snape and groomed hair and straight white teeth. ha

Hermione was happy for them. Molly and Arthur had been nervous wrecks themselves, and yet they managed to cheer everyone up with their hospitality and kindness. It was good to know that such people still existed, especially since they reached rock bottom themselves. It had been so hard to watch everyone fall apart and knowing that she couldn't do a thing for them (and people accused Harry of a hero complex!). Nothing would take the emptiness away, nothing could replace their lost son and brother. Ron had taken a fierce blow as well. One of his brother had died. Hermione remembered what it felt like, after all she had lost a brother that day as well. Fred had been as a brother to her, maybe not blood related but in the way in which the Weasley's considered her and Harry family, like extended brothers and sisters.

Hermione tried not to think of the war too much. It was just too painful. She quickly focussed on the conversation replaying between Harry, Ron, Ginny and Oliver.

'Why wouldn't you go back? I think it's a great opportunity to finish your last year!' Oliver said.

'Oliver, you don't like studying at all,' Hermione commented drily as she took a sip of her butterbeer.

'I know, but that means you can play Quidditch again and beat Slytherins ass. And you don't have to work, don't have to find a place stay. You can prolong the jump into ultimate adulthood with another year. Why not take that chance?'

'I should have known it was about Quidditch.'

'Wood, that's exactly the problem,' Ron said, 'We cannot play Quidditch.'

He looked like he swallowed a lemon, like it was a painful thing to say.

'What?! Why in Merlin's name not?' Oliver said.

'It wouldn't be fair to the years below us, would it? We've had the chances of playing Quidditch, of playing for our house, but the younger kids hadn't. It wouldn't be fair to steal their chance and position away from them. It's just like we can't become Head boy or girl,' Hermione said solemnly. She had always dreamed about being Head Girl. She worked so hard on her studies, she did everything she could to ensure the position would be hers, but it wasn't. And the worst part was that she knew who did get the position.'

'I'm sorry Hermione,' Ginny said.

Hermione knew Ginny felt guilty towards her about receiving the position, but she also knew that Ginny would not give it up. And for that Hermione slightly resented her. She sighed.

'I know Gin, but you made it fair and square.'

'Yeah that's true Gin! You did work very hard for it and you will be an official seventh year! We're just...unofficial seventh years,' Harry piped up. Hermione inwardly groaned. The boyfriend to the rescue. She had to admit it quite stung a bit to hear Harry say it out loud, especially while he knew that Hermione gave the position up to come along with him and Ron on their quest to kill Voldemort. And considering how hard Hermione had worked for the position compared to Ginny, Ginny wouldn't hold a candle next to Hermione's study record.

'Yeah Gin, plus you're a lot more popular and socially capable than our dear Herms,' Ron said good naturedly.

I must not hit boys, I must not hit boys was the mantra that run through Hermione's head. This was exactly the reason why Hermione and Ron broke up. And he accused Hermione of being socially inept?

'Do you think a lot of our old classmates will be coming back?' Hermione asked, desperate to change the subject.

'Not sure, I think Neville is coming back! I talked to him last week, he was buying his schoolbooks. He told me his Gran wanted him to finish his education, so that afterwards he could apply for an apprenticeship with Sprout,' Harry said.

Ron shuddered.

'Why would he want to spend even more years in Hogwarts, must be mental that one.'

Meanwhile Oliver and George were having a heated discussion about the latest match between the Flying Falcons and Puddlemere United, the team for which Oliver played the position of keeper.

'I swear, Higgs should learn how to fly and keep his head on straight. Bloody idiot, almost attack Jenkins from the Falcons last week, Jenkins apparently said something about his mother,' Oliver laughed.

'Yeah I think we can count Neville in,' Ginny said, 'What about the other Gryffindors?'

'No clue, I think the Patil twins are coming back as well since the coast is clear. And maybe Lavender,' Harry said, smirking at Ron.

'That would be amazing, wouldn't it Won Won?' Ginny said in a high pitched voice, batting her eyelashes.

A faint red tinge appeared on Ron's cheeks.

'Uh yeah whatever you say,' he mumbled.

'What about the Slytherins?' Hermione asked.

Harry narrowed his eyes.

'I don't care what they do, I hope they won't be coming back. No need to let them ruin the peace we've just managed to create.'

Hermione sighed.

'They have as much right to be there as we have Harry,' she said, slightly shifting in her chair. This was dangerous ground to thread on.

'Which is true, if it weren't for the fact that they were too cowardly to fight for the Dark Lord and certainly not ready to fight with us.'

'Harry, it must be difficult, knowing what is right and acting on it meant forsaking one's family. I'm not sure how I would react in such a situation.'

'No Hermione, you would never lay low and claim to be 'neutral', never and you know it. It's rubbish, that's what it is. They knew the death eaters were fighting for a lost cause, even though they all held the same beliefs. But they were just afraid to risk Azkaban,' Harry said hotly, then added mumbling: 'Bloody cowards, not even deeming their own cause worthy to fight for. Then I have more respect for the convicted death eaters, at least they were prepared to fight for what they believed in.'

Hermione gasped.

'Harry, don't you say that! They were just lost kids, just like we were! Only we had the luck to be born on the right side, while they don't! I'm not saying we all should be buddies and do Merlin knows what together but we can at least show them some respect and leave them alone.'

'I'll give them respect when they deserve it,' Harry said, his arms crossed. Ah, defensive mode.  
Hermione knew a lost cause when she saw one. Stubbornly she crossed her arms as well.

'Oh give it a rest you girls,' George said happily, 'We don't let a bunch of Slytherins ruin our evening now would we?'

He gave Hermione the puppy dog eyes. She sighed and conceded defeat.

'Fine,' she huffed, 'But I'm not finished with you Potter.'

'That sounded like it belonged in the bedroom,' said Oliver smirking.

'Oi, he's mine Hermione, trying to steal my boyfriend now too?' Ginny said playfully and nudged her in the side. Hermione gave a hesitant smile and Harry had the grace to blush.

*********

Pansy Parkinson was laying on her bed while she stared at the ceiling. Twenty rows of twenty tiles. How lovely.

She was thinking of the war. Again. She couldn't help it. It had been a year and still it haunted her. She had wanted to give Potter to the Dark Lord. To just let him die. While he was innocent. Well, as innocent as Gryffindors could be. It was hard to tell sometimes, with their holier-than-thou appearances.

Every since the Battle of Hogwarts she had wanted to take those words back. Why? She still meant them. If they had given Potter on time, her mother wouldn't have died and her dad wouldn't be in Azkaban. She would still have a life, Draco Malfoy would still be her boyfriend, Blaise and Daphne still her friends. But no.

She wasn't stupid. She knew that people thought she was a filthy coward for what she had said. But she still meant it. That didn't mean that she wasn't ashamed. Harry Potter went down in the history books as a hero, Pansy Parkinson went down as an oral fable of treachery and cowardice. Great.

Blaise and Daphne hadn't said anything about grabbing Potter, but Pansy knew they wanted to. They were just better at hiding their feelings than she was. Maybe her inner Gryffindor came out and she was finally able to fight for her beliefs. But no.

She sat up and stretched her back. It sounded as if she broke a bone. Ugh, she had been so awfully stiff lately.

Her musings were interrupted as an owl flew through her window. It dropped an envelope on her bed, screeched at her and left again. Pansy stared at the envelope in horror. It bore the Hogwarts seal.

No, no way. Not possible. Never in a million years.

She ripped it open in a frenzy and read through her, her eyes wide with horror. She had to, she had no other choice. Except Azkaban maybe. Then she could see Draco again. But they probably keep males and females in different blocks...

Oh sweet Merlin.

********

Blaise Zabini woke up this evening with a head ache. And not a normal headache either. A pounding hangover. He sat up and felt the room spin. Not his house either by the looks of it. He stumbled out of bed to find his clothes, not even looking at the figure besides him. Another girl, another evening; no big deal. He put his clothes on and fled.

When he came home he nearly tripped over his half packed Hogwarts trunk. He stood up, gave it a good kick and fell into his own bed, deep asleep within seconds.

He never noticed the letter on his desk.

*******


	2. Chapter 2

_Chapter 2_

The next morning Blaise woke up, again, with a drumming headache. The faint 'pow pow pow' bounced off the inside of his skull, threatening to pop his eyes from his sockets. He moaned in agony. Blindly he run his hand over his nightstand. It took him three tries to find the little vial he was looking for. He swallowed the disgusting contents in one go.

A sober up potion was never a pleasant experience. Your entire body would be instantly hydrated. It felt suffocating. Blaise shuddered, even though the feeling had been unpleasant, nothing is as bad as a real hangover.

Time to shower, he thought grumpily.

******

Draco sat on his own bed, the first time in two years that he could sit here and not worry about being killed. It felt weird. He slightly bounced experimentally, wondering how long it would take for his parents to invade his room.

The reunion had been uncomfortable. Lucius and Narcissa had not been notified that he was getting out. When he suddenly stood on their doorstep, their jaws dropped. Narcissa had ran to him and nearly strangled him with all her hugging. Lucius just stood there, staring at him. No doubt he replayed all his own past mistakes through his mind and wondering how they came here. When Lucius pulled himself from his stupor he clapped Draco on the back and said 'welcome home son.'  
Draco had never felt quite so alone. He immediately escaped from his parents' company and went to his old bedroom. Two faded wallpapers of his favorite Quidditch team, a wallpaper of the Witch of the Month. The surface of his desk was still littered with papers, old essays and the like. Essays, homework. What an unpleasant line of thought. Contrary to popular belief, Draco's room was rather small. He had no use for the King suites the Manor held. What's the use if one could get killed at any minute?

He had fallen asleep in a minute last night, right after he penned the letter to Blaise. To sleep in his own bed again clearly had its merits.

Draco laid back on his bed, hands behind his head and closed his eyes. He wished he could disappear. He felt a little inside out.

Then the door opened.

'Hello mum' he mumbled.

'Just wanted to see how you are dear,' Narcissa said as she walked towards his bed and sat down on it. He could see her red rimmed eyes and felt uncomfortable. It's never a pleasant feeling to know that you made your mother cry.

'Mum,' Draco started, but she put a finger on his lips with a wry smile on her face.

'I never wanted any of this for you Draco,' she started, her eyes filling up again, 'I never wanted for you to go to Azkaban, I just wanted you to be safe. I know you might not belief me but your father never wanted this either. I guess he just didn't know how far his beliefs would take you.'

Narcissa sniffed.

'That's bullshit and you know it,' Draco said softly, 'He knew exactly where we were heading, but found out to late. And he couldn't stop it. That's all there is to it mum and you know it just as well as I do.'

Narcissa shook her head.

'No,' she whispered, 'No, he would never intentionally get us killed or thrown in prison Draco. Never.'

'That's just because his own plan backfired. He hoped the Dark Lord would get us in an even higher position but I guess it didn't. We dropped to rock bottom. And that's what he probably regrets,' Draco couldn't help but sound resentful.

Narcissa took his hand.

'Don't think the worse of your dad Draco. Every parent does what he or she thinks is best for their child. If I had known what you would have done after the war, I would have shipped you up to Durmstrang any day. But I'm no seer, and neither is your father. Do you think we wanted you to end up in Azkaban? We were so happy we got off so lightly after the war, no Azkaban, nothing. We never wanted you to end up as a murderer Draco!'

Narcissa's voice was getting a hysterical edge.

'Could you leave me alone mum? I'm not in the mood.'

Narcissa sighed, stood up and walked towards the door. She hesitated, turned around and gave Draco a hesitant smile and left.

Draco closed his eyes tightly. He knew it wasn't fair to blame his father, he had been somewhat of an adult as well. He had had a choice and he had taken the wrong one. But the reality of finding that the mess your life has become is your own fault isn't a pleasant one and Draco rather avoided the truth.

******

Pansy was hyperventilating. She didn't want to go back. She didn't want to face the crowd, not now, not ever. She had practically been a hermit after the war ended, she couldn't stop now. But she had to. She had no other choice.

The Ministry was forcing them. Them being the sons and daughters of the death eaters. Those who were too cowardly to fight, too scared to join a side, even though everyone knew that if the Dark Lord won, they would be on his side.

Pansy tried to calm herself down by laying down and closing her eyes. Her chest went up and down rapidly. Happy thoughts, logical thoughts, she told herself. 'Why would they force us to go back to Hogwarts?' She thought about the possibilities. 'Probably to keep everyone in one space so it will be handier to monitor us. Why would they want to monitor us? Because they're not sure where our alliances lay. What can I do about that? Pick a side. What side? I don't know…'

No one would ever expect it by looking at Pansy, but Pansy was a logical being. Logic calmed her in moments like these. She wasn't that emotional, not to the degree of which everybody thought she was. She was logical, logic made sense, emotions did not. Emotions made you weak and vulnerable, logic did not. So logically deducted: the Ministry wanted to keep on an eye on the sons and daughters, therefore sending them to Hogwarts together. Here they could keep track of their uses of magic and maybe any ambitions to start a new war. So all Pansy had to do was show that she converted her ways and the Ministry would be off her back. Easy peasy right?

*******

Hermione sat on the porch of the Burrow, having a great view of the garden. She was getting a bit fed up with the crowd inside. Not that she didn't love them, she most certainly did, she would die for them. But it was just suffocating. Hermione had idly toyed with the idea of going back to her parents, but had decided against it. She couldn't live with them in one house, not anymore. So instead of looking for her own place, she alternated between the Burrow and Grimmauld place. Although she recognized that Harry and Ginny would want their privacy. She sighed. Harry and Ginny's relationship had been so perfect. Pity hers and Ron didn't last longer than three months. They just weren't made for each other.

'What are you doing out here Herms?' Harry asked as he sat next to her on the porch.

'Escaping the madness,' Hermione replied as she pulled the hem of her collar in order to let some fresh air in.

Harry chuckled.

'Yeah, it seems like it's getting worse every day. All those happy faces. Who would want to be part of that?' Harry said drily as he wiped the sweat from his forehead. It was just too bloody warm! 'Look, Hermione, about our earlier conversation…'

'Yes?'

Harry hesitated slightly and looked away for a second.

'It's probably a subject we're never going to agree on so shall we just drop it?' Harry held out his hand.  
Hermione glanced at it and looked back into his face. She smiled

'Sure,' and grabbed his hand. Harry blushed and looked away.

'Oh come on Harry. It's been a year for Merlin's sake! Stop that,' Hermione scolded.

'I know, I know.'

*******

Blaise grumbled as he opened the envelope. He tried to get a house elf to make him coffee but the little buggers were nowhere to be found, so now he was stuck without his medicine. He pulled the letter out and read.

'Blaise,

I'm back. Come to the manor A.S.A.P.'

That was it. Blaise didn't have to guess who it was from. Draco had gotten out. The bastard couldn't just ask for something, no he had to demand it. Blaise threw the letter in the bin, then pulled on some fresh clothes and got into the floo.

He ended up in the drawing room. On the sofa in the middle of the room sat Narcissa, head in her hands and moisture on her cheeks. Lucius stood beside her, a hand on her shoulder.

'He's really out then?' Blaise asked. It was hard to believe. He hadn't seen Draco in a year. Draco hadn't wanted him to visit, that would only make it harder.

'Ye..yeah,' Narcissa stuttered, 'He's upstairs in his room. Maybe you can see how he is. He..,-' Narcissa sobbed.

'He totally closed down on us,' Lucius mumbled, 'It's good to see you again Blaise.'

'Thanks,' Blaise said and walked towards what he knew to be Draco's bedroom. It took him a good ten minutes to reach it.

Should he knock? Or just barge in. This was going to be awkward.

Then the door opened.

'Blaise,' Draco said.

'Draco,' Blaise let out. It was great to see him again, he had missed Draco.

Draco embraced him. This wasn't a hug, of course not. Men like them do not hug. Blaise slapped Draco on his back once and stepped back to take a good look at him. He gaped. He looked like a living corpse. His ribs were protruding through his shirt and he had large bags under his eyes. The Dark Mark peeked at Blaise from his left forearm, strange white lines crossing it.

'How have you been?' Blaise asked as he sat down at Draco's desk, eying the mess.

'Hanging in there I guess,' Draco said as he sunk down on his bed, 'But it's getting better. Just need some time you know, while I adjust to all this space,' he said sarcastic.

'Space?'

Draco lifted his pant leg.

'What's that?'

'Apparently some sort of Muggle device to keep an eye on me,' Draco said as he wiggled his leg and the bracelet moved, 'I can't move out of the manor and once we're in Hogwarts I can't go to Hogsmeade and all. A condition the Ministry set you know.'

'But why mate? I thought you were getting out?'

'Nop. Dear old dad managed to get me out of prison, but my sentence isn't over yet. It'll be over after the school year.'

'You don't seem too upset by it?' Blaise asked. Draco seemed strangely serene, he wasn't frowning and his eyes didn't look troubled.

'I'm not. I guess I just accept it. It would be too optimistic to hope for anything less. And I suppose it's nothing less than I deserve. I did murder someone Blaise.'

Blaise knew this was true, but it seemed so weird. To accept that your best friend took someone else's life. This was Draco, just Draco. His best friend and nothing more. Not a death eater, not a murderer. Nothing. Just Draco

'Why did you do it Draco?'

Draco looked down at his hands.

'I was so angry. I couldn't control it anymore. I just wanted to destroy him, the filthy Muggle. He was the reason my family and I were shunned, social pariah's. I blamed him for my own mistakes. And I couldn't control it. I just did it.' Draco looked at Blaise and smiled a crooked smile. 'I guess I just lost it. I felt ashamed and angry. And he was there, challenging me. I don't know why I went into Muggle London that day, I just did. I wanted distraction. It was so hard.'

Blaise tried to make sense of his words. Somehow it fit.

'Do you regret it?' he asked.

Draco looked away, stared out his window.

'Of course I do. Not only because it pretty much ruined my life, but also because I had no right to take someone's life. It's not up to me to decide who gets to live or die.'

Blaise sighed.

'What was Azkaban like? I heard there were a lot of modifications to the system.'

'Yeah,' Draco snorted, 'It was still awful. Only now it was hygienic and I had a bed to sleep in.'

'That must have made it considerably easier,' Blaise mused.

'Not really. It's still a year with nothing but your own conscience in your head. That doesn't help much.'

'Didn't you have any other contact with other prisoners then?' Blaise said, his brow furrowing.

Draco let out a humorless laugh.

'Only during breaks and feeding time. But they weren't a pleasant company. All of them stuck in their old ways.'

Blaise shifted in his chair.

'There must have been relatively normal people there. You know, non death eaters or pureblood supremacists?'

'Yeah they were there too. But it's like a battlefield. Everything that happened out here at Hogwarts, the war, the ideology, everything happens within prison as well. It's like a mini society. The only difference is that in the outside world you can stay neutral. In Azkaban you have to be part of one gang or another. If not, you're life is forfeit. It isn't pretty. And the guards aren't any help either, they just leave the gangs up to their business,' Draco said bitterly.

They both fell silent.

'I'm glad you're back,' Blaise said. And he really was.

****

With thanks to my beta's Enwen & Zynn! Please r&r!


	3. Chapter 3

_Chapter 3_

After Blaise had left, Draco felt better. Lighter in some way. For the first time he had been able to talk about the murder. He felt relieved. Like a boulder dropped of his shoulders. He had hoped Blaise was still …well Blaise, that he wouldn't judge him and still be his friend. And Blaise didn't disappoint.

Suddenly a house elf appeared in the room. It was Mitsy, Draco's old nanny.  
'What?' he asked.

Mitsy seemed to tremble, her large eyes filling with tears.

'Mitsy is happy, so very happy to see Mr. Malfoy back! Did they hurt Mr. Malfoy? Are you okay Mr. Malfoy?'

Draco frowned.

'Of course I am fine Mitsy. What do you want?'

'Master Malfoy and Mrs. Malfoy want Mr. Malfoy to come down for dinner in thirty minutes,' she said timidly.

Draco nodded.

'I'll be there Mitsy, you can leave now.'

With a pop Mitsy disappeared.

This was going to be harder than he originally thought. His parents felt awkward around him, like he would explode any minute now, to start ranting about filthy Muggles. How could he tell them he wasn't that kind of person anymore? That he didn't believe in the bullshit he was taught anymore. Especially when one's father is a pureblood supremacist.

Draco sighed and grabbed a bunch of papers from his bag. The only belongings he had had in Azkaban: a toothbrush, two sets of clothing (potato sacks if you asked him), a hairbrush, three pencils, an eraser and a load of sketching paper. Draco smirked idly, what would his death eater friends say now if they knew Draco had turned to the creative arts to feel as least a bit human? He opened his drawing folder and looked through it. Sketches of his cell, sketches of himself in his cell, sketches of the others, sketches of what he dreamed the outside of Azkaban looked like, with the sea and the wind and the rocks. Then there were the pictures of his 'friends'. Making friends in Slytherin isn't hard. It's very simple because in Slytherin you hardly had any other options, you couldn't be friends with the Ravenclaws, Hufflepuffs or, the least of all, Gryffindors. So Slytherins were the only options. And it also depended on your definition of 'friends'. People to hang out with seemed like a better definition.

He drew Pansy, sitting on the Hogwarts express, from memory. She kind of looked alike. He still had a lot of practice to do, because sure, Pansy looked like a human being, but not like the Pansy he knew. That's the thing, he could draw human beings, but he couldn't give them that little bit of magic that makes people recognize them.

He also drew Blaise and Theodore Nott, he drew his parents, his house elf and the Malfoy Manor.  
Draco decided to work on his latest project: the perfect woman. He hadn't come much further than the legs, but Merlin's left ball, what legs they were.

Dinner with his parents wasn't for at least 25 minutes so he had time. He put his pencil on the paper and started to draw.

*****

Hermione stood in front of the door. She had been standing here for twelve minutes and still she hadn't moved. Luckily it was dark outside so her parents wouldn't see her. She hesitated, should she go in? Or should she just leave. They did have the books she needed, they were still in her old bookcase upstairs.

Before she could change her mind she knocked and held her breath.

'I'll get it dear,' she heard her mother say. Hermione shifted from one leg to the other with closed eyes.

The door opened.

'Oh Hermione it's you,' her mother said a bit frostily.

'Yes Mum, it's me. Can I come in?'

'Yes you may,' her mum said as she turned around and sat down on the couch.

'Where's dad?' Hermione asked as she shuffled into her old house. Nothing really changed. All the pictures were still on the mantle, the furniture was still the same.

'Black Jack evening.'

'Oh.'

Her mother fell silent. Hermione couldn't stand it.

'How have you been mum?'

'Fine Hermione.'

'And how's dad?'

'Also fine.'

That was helpful. Hermione sighed.

'Why are you here Hermione?' her mother asked tiredly. Hermione took a good look at her and she noticed how tired and worn out her mother looked.

'Mum are you okay? You look horrible,' Hermione said as she sat down next to her mother on the couch.

'I am fine. You want to know what my problem is? You see, I have this daughter. She is such a lovely, brave and very clever girl. But she's not the same as I am, as her dad is. She's different, a witch you know. And she conveniently forgot to tell her parents that there was a war going on, one in which she played a very large part. And because she was afraid for our wellbeing, she send us away to Australia, I'm sure you know Australia? Yes, well, she sent US, the parents away, while we SHOULD be here to protect our daughter. Do you know how much that hurts Hermione? Do you? To know that you, as a parent, cannot protect your child? And then afterwards find out it was 'in our best interest'. That hurts, Hermione, that bloody hurts.'

Hermione couldn't believe what she was hearing. She balled her fists and stood up.

'Answer me one question mother,' she said stiffly, 'Are you alive?'

Her mother answered just as stiffly: 'Yes.'

'Then what's your bloody problem! You could have died if you stayed here mum! I'm sure they never told you this, but I nearly died! They tortured me! I felt like all my organs were being squeezed out of my body, like my blood was on fire, like there were several knifes puncturing my arms and legs! You have never experienced anything like that and I wanted to keep it that way. What I did was my decision, and if you don't agree with it that is your own problem. I did what I had to do to keep my beloved parents safe. And if you can't be with me for it, so be it. I would do it all again if I had the chance.'  
Hermione walked past the couch, upstairs to her old bedroom. She grabbed the books she was going to need this year and went back downstairs. Their eyes locked for a moment.

'Goodbye mum. Maybe I'll see you for Christmas or in the spring break,' Hermione said. She strolled to the front door.

Her mother called after her but she didn't react, she just barged out of the door and apparated to Grimmauld Place. She couldn't be at the Burrow now, it was too busy.

Hermione went over to the alcohol cabinet and got out a butterbeer. She could _so _use this. She sunk down in the couch, took a sip of her drink and let the tears fall. Her parents couldn't stand the sight of her. They had been so loving, so caring. But what Hermione had done was apparently the ultimate betrayal. She finished her butterbeer and put the bottle on the table.

Suddenly the floo turned green and Harry stepped through, his forehead covered in soot. As soon as he saw Hermione sitting on the couch he flew to her.

'Hermione? What happened?' he asked as he sat down next to her.

Hermione sniffed and wiped her nose.

'My parents hate me, ' she croaked, 'they just don't understand Harry! They have never been in a war like we have. They only hear the word war, but don't get the images that the word evokes in me. They know we've been through a war, but they haven't seen it. They just don't understand,' she finished in a high pitched voice.

Harry frowned and wrapped his arms around her.

'I'm sorry,' he whispered.

Hermione buried her face in his chest and cried.

'Ginny and I got into a fight tonight,' Harry said, smiling a bit sadly.

Hermione looked up.

'Oh I'm so sorry Harry. What kind of friend am I, never asking how you are.'

'It's okay. I think Ginny is staying at the Burrow tonight. You want to stay here?' Harry asked.

'Yes please. I can't go to the Burrow. Way too much noise. I need some quiet. Thank you Harry.'

****

Pansy was doubting. Her normal dressrobes or the extravaganza ones? She couldn't decide so she put both of them in her trunk. You never knew when you might need them. She had bought her books today, in Diagon Alley. Pansy smiled to herself. It was a successful day. No one had sneered at her or called her names. A step in the right direction. Hogwarts would probably be different, very different. She was just glad she didn't have an ugly snake and skull tattoo on her left arm. That would have made things considerably worse.

Maybe, just maybe she could get through this.


	4. Chapter 4

_Chapter 4_

One could say that Draco had quite a few occasions in his life in which he had been afraid, terrified even. But nothing could compare to the anxiety he felt at the current moment.

Draco felt his heart beat in his throat. Thump, thump, thump. Cold sweat formed on his back, the shirt of his uniform sticking to his flesh as the droplets ran down his spine slowly. He shrugged his robes off his shoulders in a hurried frenzy as if it were on fire. He released the heavy suitcase in his hand. With a thud it hit the moist ground.

When the Ministry first notified him of his 'punishment' he laughed. He had the audacity to laugh out loud. Not a chuckle, but a full blown loud symbol of amusement. Now he realized why the auror who had brought the message had smirked. The ass had known. This was worse than having a psychopath in your house. It was almost as bad as Azkaban. At least what they did to him wouldn't differ much. Draco shivered, he hoped not.

Draco was quite sure he couldn't survive this. They would eat him alive after all he had done. They weren't going to have any mercy, he was sure of it.

He had gone back to Hogwarts.

*****

Pansy was beyond nervous. She felt like a paranoid wuss these days, always looking over her shoulder, keeping her head down, afraid that people would notice or remember her.

She walked into the Great Hall, glancing around. Most students still had to arrive. Luckily. Quickly she made her way to the Slytherin table, quite a few students had already arrived. When she saw Blaise sitting there, she immediately hurried over to him and sat next to him.

'Hey Blaise,' she murmured. A crooked smile lit his handsome face.

'Pansy, long time no see. I already started to think you left Britain for good.'

'I had things on my mind,' she replied, 'How are you Blaise? How have you been?'

Blaise shrugged.

'Well you know me, went here and there, did a little here and there.'

'Ah, very informative as always,' Pansy replied drily, 'I am to assume you've been forced back as well?'

Blaise smirked.

'Of course, the Ministry can't be too careful with dangerous people like us right? Who knows what we might do when they let us around, let's say, Diagon Alley. Wow, that would hit the headlines if we, a bunch of teenagers, would go _shopping_. Maybe my mother will turn up and…I don't know? Buy us ice cream? Disastrous of course. '

Pansy laughed weakly, without finding it funny. She did appreciate Blaise's, though poor, attempt at humor. He smiled drily.

'That would be such a disaster indeed. Not that your mother would actually buy us ice cream.'

****

It was so great to see everyone together again. Hermione looked around her at the Gryffindor table, seeing all those smiling faces and again knew that this is what they had fought so hard for. This was it. Happiness, a chance at a normal life, a chance to be a real teenager. Not that they were real teenagers anymore, they had seen way too much destruction for that. And on top of that, they were nineteen. Their teenage years would quickly be over, especially hers. In a few days she would turn twenty and then there was no going back.

'I see all the Slytherins came back,' Harry said to Neville, nudging him in the side.

Neville, who looked so tall and grown up, looked behind him and scanned the Slytherin table.

'Yeah I know. They had to come back you know, they were forced by the Ministry. It was either Hogwarts or Azkaban,' he shrugged, 'As long as they stay out of the way.'

'Wait, is that actually Malfoy? I thought he went to Azkaban, for..you know..that murder.' Ginny said.

Hermione turned around and watched Malfoy walk into the Great Hall. When she looked around she saw they weren't the only ones who had noticed him. From all four tables people banded together and whispered.

'It really is him,' Harry said in wonder, 'How could they let him get back in here? He's a killer for Merlin's sake!'

Malfoy seemed impossibly stiff, like he was walking towards his doom. It might seem that way if the entire Great Hall was looking at you like that.

Hermione was surprised when she read the paper that day, over a year ago, somewhere in June. Draco Malfoy had killed a Muggle.

'I vividly remember the day Hermione told me Malfoy wasn't a murderer. I guess you were wrong Herms,' Harry said smugly.

Hermione glared at him. How could he be smug about that? That wasn't a laughing matter.

'I guess I was wrong then,' she said stiffly.

'Wow people listen up! Hermione Granger. Was. Wrong!' Harry said, laughing. The Gryffindors laughed with him.

Hermione glared once more, then turned her attention to the Slytherin. Malfoy looked tired, he had bags under his eyes and hardly smiled. Not that he smiled much before. Hermione couldn't really tell anyway, she never paid a lot of attention to him. He was just an annoying fly who wouldn't go away, no matter how hard you tried to chase it out of your personal vicinity.

The others lost interest in Malfoy and returned to their previous conversation. Hermione did not. She kept on watching him with a frown upon her face.

Malfoy stopped in front of his old friends, Zabini and Parkinson. He seemed nervous as he swallowed and sat down opposite of them. Pansy's face seemed to lit up at his arrival. Hermione smiled wryly, Parkinson probably still had the insane need to cling to him as if they were glued together.

The sorting began but Hermione couldn't concentrate. She kept looking at the Slytherins.

Hermione wondered why he killed the Muggle. The papers said it was a crime passionele. He had just done it in the spur of the moment. Hermione remembered that day, she hadn't believed it when she read it in the papers. To her he was just Malfoy, annoying slime ball, not a murderer. She guessed he was more like his father than she had originally believed. Which was a pity, everyone had potential.

****

Even though dinner was delicious, as always, Draco couldn't help but poke his food around on his plate.

'Aren't you going to eat? It's really good,' Pansy asked him.

Draco smiled drily.

'I was just about to,' he said as he scooped some mashed potatoes onto his plate. Pansy was right, it was really good.

Blaise and Pansy talked like they had never been apart. They would make a good couple Draco thought.

Ugh, Draco felt stuffed. Too much mash, he grimaced and pushed his plate away.

When McGonnagal stood up, everyone fell silent. Draco looked at the stern witch. She still looked the same, as an old spinster. He couldn't help but respect this woman though. She had cleaned up after…everything. And did a damn good job too. The Great Hall looked precisely the same as before. Except for the statue at the entrance, a memorial to all the people who fell.

McGonagall took a deep breath and started off the welcome speech.

'I am proud to see you all here tonight. There are more students who have returned than I had expected. As you all know, this is the first year after the War that Hogwarts opens again. This is the year were everyone can make a fresh start.'

Draco snorted. Right, as if it were that easy.

'I hope that you all will put aside your differences and co-operate and maybe even be civil to one another,' McGonagall smiled drily, 'I do understand this might be hard for lot of you,' glancing at the Slytherin and Gryffindor table, where people smiled and giggled apologetically, 'but I think that everyone is with me when I say we do not need another war on our hands. The last war was horrible and destructive enough, the Wizarding World could do without another conflict. This year will put emphasis on interhouse relationships. It was what late Headmaster Albus Dumbledore would have wanted. A united Hogwarts, a united student body.'

Blaise leaned to him and said under his breath: 'I'm alright with uniting some student bodies.'

Draco smirked.

'- The Forbidden Forest is as the name says, forbidden. So excuses about not remembering it was off limits will not work,' McGonagall said, glancing at the Golden Trio. Draco saw Potter and Granger grin. 'You all know the rules. Now, let me introduce the new Defense against the Dark Arts teacher, professor R. Lupin.'

A cheer erupted from the crowd. Students, especially from the Gryffindor table stood up and clapped and cheered. Draco's face remained passive. He didn't necessarily like the man but didn't despise him either. Lupin was alright he guessed. He looked very tired though, bags under his eyes and a scar ran across his cheek. Greyback had been responsible for that, Draco recalled.

Draco zoned out. He didn't hear the rest of the welcome speech. He couldn't say he was particularly interested anyway. It was the same every year. Even though this year might have been the exception. But Draco couldn't help it. He couldn't be bothered to actually listen to the head of Gryffindor house. Instead he scanned the crowd.

The Ravenclaw table seemed to have lost the most students. It seemed ridiculously empty, they even seemed to think so. The remaining students sat together, warily looking around them. Hufflepuff was close second. Gryffindor and Slytherin seemed to have most students. Draco grinned inwardly, that was going to be very entertaining.

Draco's eyes scanned the teachers table. Snape had returned. He still looked like shit though. He always would. There were thin scars running from his ear, down into his collar. He was lucky to be alive. Draco was glad Snape was alive, he was his godfather after all.

Suddenly he heard the scraping of the benches and around him people were standing up and walking away. Draco frowned. Was it over already?

Pansy and Blaise stood next to him, expectantly looking down with raised eyebrows.

'Right, let's go,' Draco said as he too stood up.

Blaise smirked.

'Get your head out of the clouds, we're supposed to stay behind. Were you even listening?'

Draco shook his head.

'No, who wants to listen to the old bat anyway? Why are we supposed to stay behind?' He hoped they were just allowed to crawl into their beds. He was so tired. And he had a drawing to finish.

'Because we're not staying in the dungeons anymore,' Pansy said. Blaise stared at her. 'It's just a guess!'

Draco chuckled.

'Come forward please. Mr. Goldstein you too, stop chatting up. Potter, get over here,' McGonagall said as she beckoned everyone to the teachers table.

Draco noticed that all the unofficial seventh years had to stay behind. They all lined up in front of the table.

McGonagall seemed to space out for a moment, her eyes became unfocused and she said nothing. Then she snapped out of it, her eyes roaming over the students.

'Right. I trust you all have read the rules. No Quidditch, no prefects or head students. It is your generation I am most worried about when it comes to house rivalry. Because you do not truly belong in any houses anymore it's been decided all of you will live in the tower. There won't be any dormitories, but separate rooms. I will lead you there in a minute,' McGonagall said. Draco found this a splendid idea. Privacy. Just what he needed. 'This also means that we do not consider any of you part of a house. I want all of you to take off your ties and house crests. Remove them if you will.'

Everyone gasped. No houses?

'But professor! It isn't-,' Granger started but McGonagall cut her off.

'No Miss Granger, no buts. You are all grown up. I expect you all to behave as such. I know how much all of you identify with your house. But you are not just your house, you are way more than that. At this point, houses will only drive you further apart. We can't have that now can we?'

Draco could swore he saw McGonagall grin. He sighed. No house, no Quidditch, no prefect. This was going to be one boring year.

*****


	5. Chapter 5

_Chapter 5_

Hermione sat in front of the fire in their new common room, snuggled between her two best friends. Ginny sat on Harry's lap, stroking his hair and Neville sat on the armchair opposite of them. Hermione still marveled at where they had come. Together. It felt good to have two best friends. And of course Ginny. Well, Hermione didn't consider Ginny to be part of their little group. Ginny hadn't gone through what they had. She had been a bystander for most of the years. And it was still a sore spot for Hermione to admit that yes, maybe Ginny would make a better, _more social at least_, head girl.

'I can't believe it,' said Harry, 'They're throwing us in the same boat with the Slytherins! That's not fair!'

Hermione sighed. Sometimes he could be such a baby.

'I know mate,' Ron replied calmly, 'But it's not that big of a deal. I mean, we all know we're Gryffindors to the core right?'

Thank Merlin for small favors. It was so weird for Hermione to realize that yes, Ron had matured. Somewhat.

'By the way Gin, shouldn't you have first years flocking you for advice?' Ron asked drily.

Ginny looked thoughtful, but Hermione beat her to answering.

'Of course not Ron. That'll come in a few weeks time. They're still marveling at the beauty of Hogwarts. In a few weeks the groups will be defined and the bullies will start the actual bullying and the people will fall in love out of love, gossiping will start. Those things take time you know,' Hermione said.

Ron looked at her with a blank face.

'You've given it a lot of thought Herms.'

Hermione had the grace to blush. She felt the heat creep into her cheeks.

'Well,' she snubbed, 'Was it wrong to assume that I would receive the position one day?'

Ginny smiled gently.

'No, I think you were very right in your assumption Hermione. It's just…different circumstances I guess,' she said with a small shrug, then continued to stroke Harry's hair.

How dare she just dismiss it like it's nothing? For Hermione this was a big deal. She dreamed of it. She lived for it. She was a bloody prefect!

Hermione told herself to calm down. This wasn't getting her anywhere.

'I'm going to check the library. I'll see you tomorrow,' she said briskly as she stood up. Harry and Ron shared a look that said 'oh Merlin'. Hermione ignored them and strode though the portrait hole, away from their …happiness. It sounded petty, but Hermione couldn't quite grasp how they failed to miss how important this was for her. And to see Ginny walk away with the title she wanted so badly. It stung. She wasn't jealous of course, but …maybe she felt envious. Maybe.

She walked down the stairs towards the library, deep in thought.

*****

Draco stood on the bottom of the stairs. He hesitated. Should he go up? Blaise was already there and so was Pansy. He would have to go in alone. Could he do that? The other students didn't seem too hostile. He was just about to step on the bottom step when someone nearly knocked him over. He quickly moved out of the way so the other student could pass.

It was Granger.

And she didn't even notice him. She kept her head down and just walked on.

Draco frowned. What the…? Last thing he remembered from Granger was that she had no trouble putting people in their place. He at least expected a scolding for daring to stand in her way.

He watched her disappear around the corner. Was it his imagination or did she grow taller? He shook his head and proceeded up the stairs.

The common room was filled, nearly all students were there. He hadn't been here before, he didn't even know this part of the castle existed. Their common room was large and circular, a few couches and armchairs crammed inside. A fire was burning in the grate. Pff, just what they needed: more heat. Like it wasn't hot enough already? On the left side a hallway led to rooms for the girls, or women, as Draco noticed, and on the right a narrow hallway led to the rooms for the males.

A few people openly stared at him, which Draco countered with a sneer. The stares were starting to get annoying and he hadn't even been here for one day. He hoped it would wear off soon enough.

He sat down in an armchair, as far away from the Gryffindors as he could, but close enough to have some light from the fire. He really, _really _did not want to be near them. Especially because there was no Blaise or Pansy in sight. Let's see, there were Granger, Weasley and Weasley, Potter and Longbottom. Five against one. No, he didn't stand a chance. So Draco played it safe and left them alone.

Unfortunately Potter wouldn't have it. Potter kept on staring at him. Draco felt unnerved. He swallowed and went up to his room to retrieve his sketchbook. Better get something done he thought gloomily. When he came back he saw someone occupied his chair. With a small growl he sat down on a different chair, where he barely had any light at all. He grabbed his wand and accio-ed a candle.

Starting with thin lines, he continued to expand the beautiful legs he'd been drawing. The legs now had feet. Very shapely feet, might he add.

Admiring his handy work, he didn't notice the figure standing in front of him.

'Never thought you'd be the artistic type Malfoy.'

Draco's head shot up. Great. His I-avoid-Gryffindors-at-all-costs-especially-if-there-are-more-of-them-around-tactic failed. He quickly closed his sketchbook.

'Can I help you Potter?' he asked. Potter was no reason to get worked up over, still he couldn't help but feel threatened. Draco's hand moved to his pocket. He wrapped his hand around his wand, feeling the smooth wood in his fingers. With his wand, nothing could happen to him. He was vividly reminded of his childhood teddy bear. With the Bear around, nothing could happen to him. At least, that was what he had believed. The Bear didn't help much once he got older though.

'Changed your ways in prison? I heard there's this thing they do to pretty boys like you in prison. Decided you rather play for the other team?' Potter asked, his arms crossed over his chest.

'Is that an invitation Potter? Although I have to decline, I don't swing that way. But I think Weasley there would just love to get you close to him.'

Potter narrowed his eyes.

'I think it's better if you close your mouth Malfoy. Words coming from you is never a good thing. Besides, you're alone and-,' Potter said, but was rudely cut off.

'Ah Potter. You again. Stop harassing Draco okay? He's not interested. I thought he made that quite clear,' Blaise stepped in. Draco was thankful. With a small grin he looked at Blaise who seemed thoroughly snogged. His hair was mussed up and the top buttons of his shirt were open.

'Anything else Potter?' Draco asked arrogantly.

Potter glared at them, muttered something under his breath and stalked off.

Blaise sat in the armchair opposite of Draco.

'It's not like Potter to just pick random fights. What did you say to him? Blaise asked.

Draco tried his best to put up an innocent front.

'I did no such thing. He came over here first.'

Blaise snickered.

'Are you also going to tell me he _started it?'_

Draco glowered.

'He so did.'

And Blaise laughed.

*****

Later that evening Draco decided he liked his new room. It was small, yes. Even smaller than his bedroom at home. But it was comfortable. And private. No snoring, no silencio spells to make sure the others won't hear you wank. Or hear you screaming in the middle of the night when the nightmares were plaguing you. Yes, Draco could get used to this.

He couldn't help but feel slightly paranoid though. Potter slept next door. He really _really _disliked Potter. He claimed to be such a saint, while in reality he kicked others when they were down. Draco ignored the voice in his head that told him that he always started the fights and that was probably the reason why Potter disliked him so much. Or maybe it was just because he was more handsome. Potter was probably gay and had the hots for him. And tried to 'express' himself by verbal sparring. Yes, that was probably it.

Satisfied with his own logic, Draco decided he needed a shower. Badly. He grabbed his things and left his room. As soon as he was about to enter the common room he heard frantic whispering.

'Hermione. I…, I can't _not _tell her. But I'm not sure if I want to. I feel guilty Herms.'

Granger and Potter. Draco sneered.

'You can't Harry. What do you think she'll do? Some things are better left unspoken,' Granger whispered back.

So Potter had something to hide, interesting. Draco glanced around. The common room was almost deserted. Must have something to do with the fact that it was one in the morning.

'That's easy for you to say! You and Ron aren't together anymore, but-.' Potter stopped as soon as he saw Draco standing in the doorway.

*****

Hermione waited for Harry to continue. She knew it was futile, telling Ginny would get them nowhere. It would only mess everything up. Besides, like Ginny never had a fling in her life. Hermione snorted inwardly. Harry had to see reason. She was the one who would get all the blame in the end.

When Harry didn't say anything she looked at him. He was staring at a point over her shoulder. Hermione looked over her shoulder and gasped.

'Malfoy! Eavesdropping now too?' Harry asked snidely.

'Harry stop it,' she said. When Malfoy didn't move she frowned. 'Don't let us stop you Malfoy. Go on.'

Malfoy smirked and walked past them to the showers.

'Where do you think you're going?' Harry asked.

Hermione sighed. That wasn't any of their business. And she was not all that interested anyway.

Malfoy turned around with a blank look upon his face.

'Where does it look like I'm going?' he said as he proceeded to the showers, 'To the showers, duh.'

And he was gone.

'Harry, was that really necessary? Stop it and just leave them alone!' Hermione said as she dropped back in her chair.

Harry looked mildly guilty.

'I just don't have a good feeling about him being here. Can't be good, a death eater and murderer in the castle.'

Stupid Harry, Hermione thought. When would he learn? She scooted forward and grabbed his hands.

'I think of all people you would have to agree that we've had enough fighting to last a lifetime. It would be a good thing to stop here,' she spoke softly, 'Let it go Harry. Making Malfoy's last year horrible isn't going to make you feel better about everything you've lost. Just let it go. Hatred is what got us into this mess in the first place. Let it go.'

Hermione released Harry's hands and walked towards the girls dormitories.

'Good night Harry. And we're not finished yet.'

****

Harry sighed and buried his hands in his hair. Hermione just didn't understand how he felt. He needed to talk about it. With someone who preferably wasn't Hermione. She knew, but she didn't understand. He needed to make someone understand. He couldn't go to Ron, Ron would be furious. Ginny would be even worse. Ginny would dump him, he was sure of it. And still he considered telling her. Anything to get rid of the shame. He knew it should never have happened, but at the time it seemed like a good idea. Probably thinking with the wrong head. He shook his head and went to bed.

It could all wait till tomorrow.


	6. Chapter 6

_Chapter 6_

Hermione woke up to the sound of her alarm clock. She let out a throaty moan and threw the clock against the wall. Sometimes she could do without Muggle technology. The blankets were so warm. She decided breakfast could wait for another twenty minutes. Snuggling deeper under the blankets, Hermione Granger fell asleep again.

***

Ron sat at the dining table, munching down his breakfast, when Harry and Ginny propped down on the bench opposite of him.

'Good morning,' he mumbled with a mouth full of eggs.

Ginny grimaced. Her brother could be such a pig.

'Charming as always Ron.'

She filled her plate with breakfast with one hand, the other one safely entwined with Harry's. She gave a content sigh. This was how life was supposed to be. Her and Harry. And Ron on the other side of the table.

'Aren't you supposed to sit at that table?' Harry said, pointing towards the Gryffindor table.

'No. I think I'll sit with you guys from now on. It's not like there are many people there that'll miss me. I don't understand why you guys have a different table anyway. What's the use?'

'To keep us from 'identifying with our house too much', ' Ron answered.

'Where's Hermione?' asked Harry.

Ron shrugged.

'In bed?' he suggested helpfully, as he pushed his food around on his plate, neatly arranging it into the chudley cannons logo.

'Hey Neville!' Ginny called out as Neville walked towards their table. He gave them a shy wave back and sat down next to Ron.

'Shouldn't she be here?' Harry asked again, looking at Ginny.

'Who?' asked Neville as he scooped some eggs and bacon onto his plate.

'Hermione,' answered Ron.

Somewhere far away in the Great Hall McGonagal spluttered and nearly choked on her breakfast. Next to her sat Snape smirking and patting her on the back.

'Huh?' asked Neville, 'What going on with those two?'

Ginny shrugged.

'No idea. Hermione will probably be down in a second. Maybe she's taming that mop she calls hair?'

***

Draco woke up too late. The moment he opened his eyes he knew it. It was a kind of weary yearning to stay in bed, while knowing that he _had _to get up. He quickly threw his clothing on, grabbed his book bag and left his room. He had a horrible nightmare again. He was going to madam Pomfrey later today for some dreamless sleeping draught.

When he ran down the stairs he collided with something, or rather, _someone. _

'Watch it! Don't just stop on the stairs moron,' he said as he tried to manage his hair. Somehow it just didn't want to stick in place. Probably because he hadn't used any gel whatsoever.

'You sure are as charming as ever Malfoy,' Granger answered as she looked over her shoulder. Draco gaped at her.

'You're late?' he asked. Granger late? She was an annoying know-it-all, teachers pet extraordinaire. She wouldn't be late.

Granger scowled at him.

'Yes Malfoy. I am only human you know,' she grumbled as she proceeded down the stairs.

'You're not human, you're a muggleborn.'

As soon as the words left his mouth, he wished he could take it back. He told himself he didn't believe that shit anymore. Damn. Old habits and all.

Granger had turned around and stared at him. It was quite disturbing.

'What?' he snubbed as he hoisted his bag further onto his shoulders.

'You called me muggleborn…,' she said vaguely, 'Never mind. Let's go before Snape will have our heads.'

'Don't worry, he won't have my head. He actually _likes _me,' Draco said with a smirk.

Granger glared at him.

'All the more reason to pity you.'

Draco occasionally glanced at Granger. She sure had grown into a woman alright. He could clearly see the swell of her tits, which were stuffed into her blouse a bit too tightly.

'Stop staring,' she ordered curtly. A little blush appeared on her cheeks.

Draco smirked.

'Just wondering how you changed into a woman suddenly Granger. I remember you as a skinny stick figure with rabbit teeth and frizzy hair. Of course you've done nothing to flatter your hair, but hey there's potential there!'

Granger glared again.

'It would be appreciated if you'd keep your sexist comments to yourself.'

'So what were you and Potter talking about yesterday?'

They were nearly there, the doors of the dungeons dooming up in the corridor.

'None of your business,' Granger replied, a little blush creeping into her cheeks. Draco noticed she had freckles. Nice.

'Ah. A secret. I get it.'

Before Draco knew what happened, Granger pushed him against the wall, her wand under his nose.

'Malfoy. I'm saying this only once: It's. None. Of. Your. Business. Let it go' she hissed with a slightly crazed look in her eyes. Draco just smirked.

'Am I to assume you like it rough Granger? You sure have a mean push there. And you're not much of a morning person, are you?'

So Potter really had something to hide. Something important enough for Granger to use violence. This was good, very good.

'Potter and you are hiding something, and you don't want to tell anyone. But Potter does. You just made this year very interesting Granger.'

Draco pushed Granger away, righted himself and with a smirk on his face he entered the dungeons.

****

Even if Potions was a rather dull affair, it was mildly entertaining to see how Snape seemed even more vicious than before. Especially towards the Gryffindors. Well, former Gryffindors at least. No-House-Bullshit.

Blaise wondered what was up with Snape. Maybe the broomstick he had up his arse got shoved in even deeper? Probably. He never learned what happened to the Potions Master during the war, but he'd bet his entire inheritance that it wasn't pretty. The scars on his neck were proof.

'Miss Granger, put your hand down _now _or I'll put it down by force. Give someone else a chance to reply or can't your ego handle that? Patil, answer the question,' he heard Snape snarl. Granger put her hand down and frowned.

Draco nudged Blaise and leaned in to whisper: 'Wonder what Granger did to piss him off that badly. Have you seen Grangers tits?'

Blaise laughed under his breath, as he leaned forward in his chair to peek around Potters shoulder. Yes, certainly check-out-worthy. He glanced at Draco and made quite a face.

'How about Patil?' whispered Blaise to Draco.

Draco's eyes darted around to find the girl in question.

'Which one?' he hissed.

'Both!'

'Miss Granger!' Snape snarled once more.

This was a good day.

****

After Transfiguration Pansy followed Draco and Blaise to the Great Hall for lunch. So far, so good she thought. She hadn't encountered any major fights or name calling. Even though she was still wary. It couldn't be that suddenly everyone forgot, could it? She glanced around as she sat down. Draco and Blaise were chatting amicably. Pansy smiled slightly, it was good to see them getting along again.

Just as she was about to take a sip of her pumpkin juice someone bumped into her from the behind.

'Oh, I'm sor-. Oh It's you,' Ginny Weasley said as she glared at Pansy, then walked further down the table and sat down next to Potter.

Pansy looked at the happy couple with naked longing on her face. She wondered when she became jealous of the Boy-Who-Lived and his slutty girlfriend. It was just sickening how the She-Weasel put her hand in his and stroked his cheek. How they quietly laughed together. Why couldn't Pansy have that?

Suddenly she was shaken from her thoughts by a yelp. As she looked up she saw Astoria Greengrass pass their table with a satisfied grin on her face while the two other girls walking next to her giggled.

Pansy frowned and looked at Draco and Blaise.

Blaise had one eyebrow raised into Draco's direction, who was currently rubbing his bum with wide eyes.

'Shit,' Draco mumbled as he tried to fit an entire sandwich into his mouth, which failed. He quickly put half of it back on his plate, while standing up and grabbing his bag. 'I have to go. See you in the common room tonight.'

And with that he left in quite a hurry, nearly stumbling out of the Great Hall.

'What the fuck was that?' Pansy asked.

Blaise was still looking in the direction Draco left off.

'No idea.'

*********

Hermione sat at dinner, moodily staring into her mashed potatoes. Damn Malfoy. He had upset her, after their encounter she couldn't help but feel paranoid. What if he found out? Then Ginny, not to mention Ron, would certainly hear from him sooner than later. Oh Merlin, what was she going to do.

Grumpily she poked her sausage.

'What did that sausage do to you Herms?' Ron asked her while stuffing yet another spoonful into his mouth.

Hermione gave him a crooked smile.

'It exists.'

Harry glanced at her, and because he did, so did Ginny. No one said anything. After a long pregnant pause Ginny spoke.

'Well, it's clear you don't want to talk about it. Let's talk about something else.'

Hermione had to resist the temptation of glaring at the redhead. Ginny was a very nice girl, one you could count on, but sometimes Hermione wondered what drove the only Weasley girl. What were her motives, her drives and her feelings. Hermione frowned and got up.

'I'm not hungry. I'll see you later tonight.'

Briskly Hermione walked out of the Great Hall. To the library.

As she entered she looked for the most secluded spot. It was in the back and surrounded by three large bookcases. No one ever came here. Except for her of course.

She strolled towards the table, sat down and got her Ancient Runes book from her bag.

Just as she was getting quite into the book, someone strolled within a relatively close vicinity of her table. Her head snapped up and she looked around warily.

'Seen Draco have you Granger?' asked Blaise Zabini. He lounged against a bookcase.

Arrogant prick.

'No I haven't.'

'Oh,' said Zabini. His eyebrows knotted together as he looked around. 'Give me a shout when you do okay?'

'Sure.'

Hermione frowned. Zabini had looked worried. Weird, like there was anything that Malfoy couldn't handle. With a slight smirk she realized exactly what he couldn't handle. She snickered softly to herself, a very unladylike sound, then went back to her reading.


	7. Chapter 7

_Chapter 7_

Draco was hyper ventilating. Air was becoming scarce as he attempted to breathe in and out with a wheeze.

He stood in a deserted classroom, arms spread on the teachers desk and head bowed down.

For Merlin's sake, she was just a _girl. _Nothing special, just a fifteen year old _girl. _No matter how many times he kept repeating it, his body couldn't grasp that there was no danger. As he seemed to draw in less and less air, he panicked and looked around for his bag. Quickly he rummaged around in it and got a plastic bag out. He put it to his mouth and breathed in and out slowly.

Slowly his heartbeat returned to his normal pace.

Merlin....

*****

Hermione was still studying three hours later. She was hunched over the table, furiously scribbling away on the parchment. The library seemed quiet, almost too quiet. As much as Hermione liked the silence, sometimes it could be suffocating. It felt like there was something lurking in the shadows.

'It's a wonder your parchment doesn't catch fire,' said Ron.

Hermione's head shot up, Ron stood in front of her table, smiling slightly. After a moment of hesitation she returned the smile.

'I didn't see you there.'

Ron invited himself to join her table.

'No miracle, you looked far, far away,' his smile disappeared and a frown took its place.

'Yes?' Hermione asked.

Ron smiled crookedly. 'Nothing. I'm going to see where Harry's at.'

And he left the library.

What was up with him? Just barging in here, sitting down, seemingly wanting to talk about something, then leaving like that? Deep down, Hermione knew what he wanted to talk about. About them. Something Hermione wanted to avoid at all costs. She didn't want to lie to him, he did nothing to deserve that. But she didn't want to tell him the truth either.

She felt like crying.

Damn it! This was her final Hogwarts year, it should have been great, fantastic even. But nothing was going according to plan. Harry wouldn't listen to her, Ron was so sweet and understanding, but all Hermione felt was guilt and Ginny was prancing around with her head girl badge pinned to her chest.

Sod it all.

*****

Ron sat down on the couch next to Harry. The face he made must have looked funny, as Harry glanced at him with a raised eyebrow.

'What is it?' he asked.

'What do you think of Hermione and I?'

Harry blanched.

'Err...I don't know. You two seem a bit...different.'

'In a good or a bad way?' asked Ron, dreading the answer.

'Don't take it the wrong way mate, but..the bad way. You two have...pretty much nothing in common-.'

Ron interrupted him. 'Except you, you mean.'

'What?' asked Harry.

'You. That we are friends with you. That's about the only thing that kept us together, wasn't it?' asked Ron. 'I don't think there's any chance that Hermione and I will get a happy ending. Together I mean.'

'I wasn't aware you two were dating?' Harry offered carefully, as he closed the book that was in his lap. Ron didn't know that Harry read. Weird.

'We weren't,' he said simply.

'Okay...I'm confused here. Help me out.'

'We weren't dating. But any chance of us dating has gone,' Ron sad. He felt ...off. A little inside out. He wasn't hurt, not really. Disappointed? Yes. Hell yeah.

'Okay. Why?' asked Harry.

'I just felt like there might be something you know. After everything we'd gone through, I really believed that she might be the one,' as he said these words a grimace passed over his face, like he was embarrassed. He was, just a little bit.

'You really believe in the one?' Harry said quickly. 'That's girl stuff.'

'Maybe it is. I guess I just have to broaden my horizons from now on.'

'How about Lav-Lav?' asked Harry, 'Or one of the Patil twins? Or Luna! Yeah Luna would be perfect.'

Just then the door to the common room swung open with a bang and Draco Malfoy stepped through, just avoiding the doorstep clumsily. He looked dishelved, his hair was messy and his throat seemed red.

Malfoy didn't spare them one glance as he walked towards his room, his head bowed.

'What's up with him?' asked Ron. Malfoy hadn't done anything out of line...yet.

'I don't know,' said Harry as he looked straight at Malfoys door. 'He has something fishy going on about him.'

Ron sighed. Harry would never really change his ways. He was so stubborn. Not that Ron suddenly found himself championing the rights of a convicted murderer. Malfoy was still Malfoy after all. Even though Ron had to admit he hadn't bothered anyone so far.

'I don't know Harry. I haven't seen him behave out of the ordinary. Unless you leave out the bit where he doesn't call anyone nasty names anymore.'

Harry sighed and frowned.

'I don't understand why you and Hermione must stick up for him all the time. He's a bastard who has done awful things, half of it we probably don't even know about. He's a murderer for Merlin's sake. He's an evil person.'

'You can't always judge people by the things they did wrong Harry. Circumstances count for something you know. I see you found him Ron,' Hermione said as she briskly walked past the two of them towards her room.

Harry and Ron stared at Hermione as she left the common room.

'Where did she come from?' Ron asked.

'I hope she's not using the time turner again,' said Harry.

'But she is right you know.'

******

Hermione threw her bag on her bed. She did love this new sense of privacy the separate rooms offered. She was a private person and the last few years hadn't done her much good. Sharing the room with Parvati and Lavender hadn't always been bad, if one would pretend Lavender never had a crush on Ron. It had always been the girls versus Hermione. Studying versus make-up. Guess who lost?

She put her books away in the cupboard and put her essays on her desk. She nearly finished all her work, even though classes had just started. What was she supposed to do now? She was too fed up to do any more work and quite honestly, she didn't _feel _like studying right now. Maybe she should spend some quality time with her friends? Good idea.

As Hermione opened the door to join her friends in the common room, a few doors down another door opened and revealed Malfoy, looking as arrogant as ever. No, that would be a lie. In fact, he didn't look arrogant at all. He looked...lost.

Hermione edged closer, wanting to see the expression on his face as he stepped out of the door and fumbled for some object in his pocket. It made a creaking sound.

His face wasn't contorted in the usual sneer. In fact, his eyes were downcast, a frown on his face. Hermione felt intrigued. Malfoy wasn't a person who wore his heart on his sleeve. He looked so...human in that moment. Hermione didn't know Malfoy as a human being. Of course she knew he was human, but not like....other people. Someone with feelings and ambitions. Someone with fears and dreams. She _knew _he was human, but she didn't rationally feel that way about him.

Just then his head snapped up and he stared her right in the eyes. Hermione's eyes widened. She hadn't realized quite how close she got. She stood less than two meters away from him, a bit hunched, aiming to see his face.

'Uhh...,' mumbled Hermione. Merlin, this was embarrassing.

'Sneaking isn't one of your talents, is it Granger?' Malfoy said as he closed the door behind him.

Hermione straightened out and anxiously brushed her bushy hair from her face.

'I haven't been known for being subtle no,' she answered drily as she turned away from him. 'Sorry.'

Malfoy looked at her with a frown on his face. What was his problem?

'Sorry for what?' he asked.

'For sneaking up on you. Granted, I wasn't doing a good job, but I did it anyway. It's not nice to sneak up on people.'

And then Malfoy had the audacity to actually laugh out loud.

*****

Sneaking? She called that sneaking? Draco snickered at the look on Grangers face. Like she just read an Arithmancy assignment and couldn't understand it no matter how hard she studied the weeks before the test. Incredulous was a word that sprang into his mind. It was weird, laughing at Granger without any malicious intent. It seemed....friendly even. It was quite disturbing.

'Seriously Granger. You're about as sneaky as an ogre. Don't worry.'

This was getting uncomfortable. He wasn't friendly with Granger and would never be friendly with her. He was way out of his comfort zone here. He needed to get away. With a sigh, he walked past her. Where the hell was Blaise when you needed him??

'Oh Malfoy! Wait up,' Granger called from behind.

'Zabini was looking for you earlier.'

Ah, good old Blaise.

****

Blaise was roaming around the hallways, strolling lazily from corridor to corridor. It was late and he should really be returning to the common room. And he should be finding Draco.

But at the present time he couldn't be bothered. He had looked everywhere he could think of but he was nowhere to be found. Blaise worried about his friend. He acted so differently from what he was used to. He was ...Draco acted like a human being. Gone was the untouchable Malfoy heir. Blaise couldn't say that he didn't appreciate the change. The old Draco was a tiring friend, ranting about everything and everyone that didn't fit in his idealistic world.

Before Blaise knew it he stood in front of the common room door. With a sigh he decided to go in, see if Draco was there or maybe Pansy. Anyone to joke around with would be good.

'Do you happen to know where-,' asked someone from behind, 'Oh, it's you.'

It was a girl Blaise didn't immediately recognized.

'Who are you?' he asked sharply. The girl hadn't seemed too happy that it was him in front of the door and not someone else she was looking for.

'I'm a Slytherin,' she answered simply.

'I can see that. I'm not visually challenged.'

'Really, what gave it away?' she sneered.

'The green and silver tie.'

Blaise decided that sneering was very unattractive on a girl. He didn't know what he had done to deserve her scorn. On the other hand, Slytherins weren't known for their politeness or hospitality. Unless they had something to gain of course. It sounded mean and prejudiced but it was the truth.

'I'm actually looking for your friend hmm? The blonde one. Have you got any idea where he is?'

Blaise couldn't explain the feeling he got in his gut that told him to keep this girl away from Draco.

'None of your business. And he's not interested. Go away.'

Draco didn't need much more attention anyway, he was still recovering.

'He has a mind of his own, you know. He doesn't need a big body guard like yourself to guard his virtue. I'll see if I can find him somewhere else then hmm?'

The girl turned around and walked away. Well, walk would be stating the obvious. Swaggering was more like it. She sure had a nice ass, Blaise decided. He shook his head and entered the common room.

******


	8. Chapter 8

_Chapter 8 _

The first few days of school went by uneventfully. Nothing big happened, a couple of minor arguments aside. None of them centering around her. Pansy started to feel at ease, which made her uneasy. 'Never drop your guard' was a motto that her parents taught her early on and old habits die hard. But all in all it could have been worse.

As she sat in Transfiguartion class she slowly dozed off, the old bat couldn't keep her interest for long. Her thoughts consisted of her ex-boyfriend. One Sir Draco Malfoy. She couldn't precisely remember where it had gone wrong between them. It probably had something to do with the war. He had been a very outgoing person before that mess started, always ranting and raving and laughing. It seemed the war, and Azkaban, dimished his personality.

Blaise, on the other hand, seemed exactly the same. Still a flirt, still making situations bearable with humor. She loved Blaise, as a dear friend. Nothing more. Just thinking about seriously dating him made her cringe. He probably picked up a few S.T.D's here and there. He just couldn't commit himself to anyone.

Draco, on the other hand, had always been very sweet to her. When the war began he started to retreat into his shell and he let no one in. Not even her. After the war was even more confusing. Officially no one broke up with the other. They snogged sometimes, but that was all that was left. He had shut her out, especially right before he went to Azkaban. If she could call it a relationship anyway, they were just too young. Even though she felt she had matured beyond his level. Draco had seemed like a boy when they had started dating. So young and naive. Interested in girls because everyone else was. Unfortunately the war changed that.

'Miss Parkinson!' a voice rang out from the front of the classroom.

Pansy sat up straight, startled by the angry voice.

'Sorry, professor,' she mumbled. McGonagall gave her a stern glare, then asked Granger to answer the question. Pansy didn't even hear it.

Pansy stared at the blackboard. A few quotations were written down on it in a perfect, loopy handwriting. So perfect, those Gryffindors. It made her want to vomit.

From accros the room, she met the eyes of Anthony Goldstein. He narrowed his eyes, gave her a glare, then resumed paying attention to the lesson.

'Bastard', thought Pansy. She sighed dejectedly. She knew she shouldn't let things like that wear her down, it was just a look. Maybe it had nothing to do with the war, maybe Goldstein just personally despised her. That was a comforting thought.

Just five more minutes till the bell would ring and she'd be off for today. Pansy hoped the new edition of Witch Weekly had arrived by now.

'Why are you staring at Potter?' Blaise asked Draco, right before he shoved a fork in his mouth.

'I am not staring at Potter.'

'You're still doing it. And you've got this compulsive frown on your face.'

Draco sighed. Blaise knew he irritated Draco on a regular basis, but it never got old. He was a lot of fun to bait.

'I do not have a _compulsive frown_ on my face.'

'Yes you do,' Blaise retorted childishly, 'See! There it is again, you're narrowing your eyes. Did he do something to you? Or tried to?'

Draco turned his gaze to his friend and glared as hard as he could.

'No. Stop being so bloody nosy.'

Blaise stopped talking for a moment to eat more of his jacket potatoes. They were good and crispy on the outside, soft and mushy on the inside. Just as Blaise liked it.

He couldn't resist. 'I noticed it yesterday too. And I think it's Potter, but I'm not sure though. The Gryffindors in general then? You have a crush on the little Weaslette?'

'No way,' said Pansy, interfering with their very interesting conversation, 'You wouldn't like that nasty bitch right?'

Draco's eyebrows shot into his hair. 'No way. No freaking way. Don't be ridiculous. Stupid redhead.'

'Her brother then?' Pansy asked sweetly, as Draco gave her one of his evil-don't-mess-with-me-glares.

Blaise smirked knowingly. Something was up, he could smell it.

'Stop smirking like that.'

Draco hated getting caught. Yeah, so he had been staring at the Golden Trio. But certainly not for the reasons that were just discussed. The Weasleys were nothing more than a waste of space and air.

Maybe he should just explain his reasoning, before they would think he was interested in Potter. The thought made him shudder. Disgusting.

He didn't know if he wanted to though. He wanted to find out what their secret was, what were Granger and Potter hiding? What was so important that the Weasels couldn't know? Draco could take a guess, but until he was sure, he wouldn't tell a soul about it. It could be valuable knowledge.

Potter didn't seem to pay a lot of physical attention to Granger. He paid more attention to his girlcoat, who hung over him all the time. From the look on his face, Potter did not mind at all. Granger was talking to Longbottom with a big smile on her face. Nothing indicated that something was up, but he knew better.

'Let's just say I'm working on a project you'll be hearing about in the future.'

With a big smirk on his face, he continued eating, staring at the Gryffindors.

Hermione was sitting at the lake, a book open in her lap. While her gaze should have been on the book, she was staring into space instead. The sun was on the verge of disappearing behind the horizon. Sweat covered her forehead. The newspapers had called it a the warmest summer in quite a while and it felt exactly like that to Hermione.

She had to be back in the common room within the hour. If a teacher caught her out here, she'd be in trouble. Not that it really mattered, they didn't have anything to take away from her, no status, no house points. Hermione wanted to smack herself. There she went again. She vouched to herself she would stop those thoughts, she had realized she'd been overreacting. Harry's problem wasn't hers. She was proud of Ginny for getting the Head Girl status, she would make a good Head Girl.

At least, that was what Hermione tried to tell herself.

With a huff, Hermione unstuck her t-shirt from her back, her arms clumsily behind her head. The weather was hot, way too hot. It suffocated her. She grabbed the book from her lap, got up and moved closer to the edge of the water. She took off her sneakers and threw them aside. As her feet touched the cold water she let out a content sigh. Finally at peace with herself, she allowed herself to relax. She would do fine this year.

Draco needed some time away from his friends. While he really appreciated friends like Blaise and Pansy, sometimes he felt the need to get away from them. And get out of the castle. With a sneer he rememberd the boundaries the aurors had set for him. He couldn't go further than a certain point or the aurors would be alerted and they would regard it as an escaping attempt. Like he had somewhere to escape to.

With his sketchbook underneath his arm he walked towards the lake. He had just about thirthy minutes to sit outside before curfew went into effect.

When he approached the lake, he saw a lone figure sitting on the shore. Whoever it may be, Draco wanted nothing to do with him or her. He carefully walked further, hoping to find a secluded spot somewhere. He finally found it behind a row of bushes.

It wasn't a very private spot, but as long as he didn't make too much noise, no one would bother him.

He opened his sketchbook with a dissappointed sigh. His drawing hadn't progressed much, he had been too busy to properly focus on drawing. The feet had come along nicely, but since he didn't have a model it was hard to draw the details. He started drawing, but everytime he drew more lines, he erased them again.

Maybe whoever was sitting a few meters away from him could give him some silently, he pushed some branches aside to observe the person. It was Granger. Great, like that would help.

She didn't notice him at all. It seemed like she was out of this world, just staring into nothingness. Oh well, even muggleborns could have nice feet. He gazed down at her feet, which were dangling just above the water surface. He had to admit she had nice feet. Slender, small feet.

Draco made a descision right there and then. He looked once more, then put his pencil on the paper and started drawing. A small shade here, a dent there, the ancle bone, the heel: he drew it all. It was looking mighty fine.

With a humorless smile he realized Granger was helping him drawing his perfect woman. What was the world coming too?

The reason he liked drawing so much wasn't because he was the artistic type. Not at all. He intensely disliked artistic people. Take that Lovegood girl for example. She was royally fucked up in the head, always wearing weird clothing, talking in riddles. Those people aggravated him.

The reason he drew was one he had only admitted to himself. Drawing kept the memories at bay. He didn't want to think. He spent a year with no one but himself. He had done enough thinking to last a lifetime. And still, when he was in bed, he couldn't help but think. Think about that muggle man, thoughts about his parents and especially his father, thoughts about his life. Thoughts about everything. He had grown tired of it quickly.

For Merlin's sake, he even started reading before he went to bed. It took his mind off things, got him sleepy and when he put the book away he had just enough time to think about how he survived another day before he fell asleep. It worked. The rest of the time he surrounded himself with his friends and spent it by drawing. It did the trick, because slowly but surely he was beginning to feel better.

And with Granger's feet, his drawing began to look better. He had drawn the outline of the body, just a vague sketch. It was time for real curves and a real person.

If he could ever find a girl like this, he would be happy.

A/N:

Special thanks to Elmida, Kimmeh and Birdie!

Please tell me what you think of my story, give me feedback I can work with. I'd like to improve my writing, so any comments on it would be great.


	9. Chapter 9

_Chapter 9_

Draco sat in Potions, listening to his godfather drone on and on about some ingredient that should _not_ be added this day.

'I bet a months worth of honeyduke supplies that he is trying to scare and confuse Longbottom. And that Longbottom will actually manage to use the root in his potion,' Blaise whispered. Draco smirked.

'Not gonna bet on that, I agree with you.'

Again, like so often lately, he felt his eyes drawn to the Golden Trio. What kind of name was that anyway? Granger and Potter were hiding something and they were currently lying about it to the She-Weasel. If Draco had to take a guess, it was that Potter slept with someone and the She-Weasel couldn't know. But who? His first instinct screamed Granger, but she just didn't seem like the type to do that. Obviously, she did know about it, so she would have something to do with it. But would she take a rumble in the sack with Potter? Draco had always assumed she would end up with the Weasel. Maybe he had to dig around and do some detective work.

Pansy felt really small in Potions. That morning a Hufflepuff had rudely bumped into her, bruising her upperarm. She didn't even know the guy, but he apparently knew her. As he looked her over from toe to head he had sneered: 'Bitch,' and then he walked away.

Most of the times she held her head down, so she didn't notice most of the glares she felt people aimed at her. But today it was like everyone had it out for her. Logically, she knew that wasn't true, but today it seemed like her emotions overran her common sense. She did not like that one bit.

'Pans, you alright?' Blaise whispered, bending over the desk and effectively blocking Draco's parchment.

'Fine,' she mumbled. She had no incline to talk about it. Talking about feelings or problems did not make them go away. It only gave more food for thought and she had plenty of that, thank you very much. How could she make the bullying stop? What could she do to make everyone aware of her situation... There had to be a way. There had to be someone who she could talk to. Someone with influence. As she glanced at her classmates, the Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws were eliminated very soon. They were of little importance. The Gryffindors could make a change for her. But did she have the guts to do it. If there was anyone she could approach, it was probably pacifistic Granger. Granger, who always championed for the underdog. Maybe...

Hermione slowly cut her porkchop in pieces, separating the food on her plate. She had been so hungry all day, but now she had a plate filled with eatable products in front op her, she felt like retreating to her room. Just read a book, or work on an essay. It took her mind off things.

'Did you hear Levington talk today? Big tough guy, coward. I can't stand people like him,' Neville nearly spat. Hermione glanced around the table uncertainly. Before she could reply, Ginny spoke up.

'Well, I can't say I wouldn't do the same. I happen to fully agree with him. Some people should just be locked up for their thoughts.'

Hermione frowned. 'And who's going to decide who will be locked up for thought? You, Gin? Seriously. What are you guys talking about anyway?'

Ginny glared at Hermione for one second, then turned her face to Harry. 'I think someone is just agitated that she didn't receive the position she hoped for. But, we were talking about Parkinson. If cowards exist, she is one of them.'

Hermione looked at her plate. What had Parkinson done to make everyone hate her so? Sure, Hermione didn't particularly like the girl either, she had always been mean to Hermione and her friends. But that was no reason to hate her. It worried Hermione how easily her friends seemed to fall back in the hate relationship with all people who had different beliefs and opinions. It was scaring her.

'Well? Why? Is someone going to explain?' Hermione asked impatiently as she waved her fork around.

Harry glanced at her uncertainly. 'Well, she wasn't on our side during the war.'

Hermione let out an undignified snort. 'Duh. Who doesn't know that? If we take a go at everyone who wasn't with us in the war we'd be having a fulltime job on our hands. What makes her special.'

'Don't you remember Hermione?' Ginny asked with a sad look in her eye. 'Parkinson was the one who screamed to turn Harry over to You-Know-Who, so we could end the war. She wanted to give up before it even started. And worst of all, she would have given Harry's life for it. If that isn't cowardice...then I don't know what it.'

With a sympathetic glance at Ginny, Hermione sighed. She could understand Ginny's fear. Of all people, Ginny had had so much too lose during the war. She was in the middle of it all, but wasn't included in any group, thus she must have felt very lonely. The Order felt she was too young, Harry and Ron didn't want her involved because she was too precious to Harry. Her entire family had been on the front line of the war and she never got any chance to settle a score. It must have been hard on her.

Hermione felt embarrassed, how couldn't she have seen this before. It wasn't weird that Ginny seemed to fight the battle after the war. It was the only battle she could fight.

'Maybe you're right Gin,' Hermione said with a small smile. 'She had no right to sell Harry out like that. I'm just glad he's still with us.'

Somewhere from behind Hermione she heard footsteps breaking out in a run. She turned around just in time to see the back of a blonde girl who ran out of the Great Hall.

'Thanks Hermione. She heard,' Neville said frostily as he stabbed his potato with force.

Hermione frowned. 'Who heard?'

'Parkinson.'

'Oh.'

Draco sat in the library, huddled behind a book case. Every few minutes he would glance around the corner, then continue drawing furiously in his drawing pad. Behind the bookcase sat a pretty fifth year Ravenclaw studying. Draco tried his best to draw her as life like as possible, but it was hard. He hardly had any real life models to learn it from, so it was mainly experimenting. He, Draco Malfoy, just couldn't ask any girl to sit still and model for him. No one would be crazy enough..

He never heard the footsteps come up behind him, so when he felt a presence breathing in his neck he yelped and shut his drawing pad.

'What the ..-? I didn't expect you to welcome my presence with open arms Malfoy, but you seem positively terrified. Sorry,' Granger said as she crossed her arms in front of her chest. Draco exhaled deeply and checked around the corner. Damn, the Ravenclaw was packing her stuff.

Granger leaned over him and saw the Ravenclaw get up to leave. 'What were you doing anyway? Some naughty?'

Draco leaned back and snorted. 'Naughty? My, my Granger, is that filthy mind of you bothering you again?'

'Not really, but normal people don't yelp like that when they're doing something legal.' Draco held his pad ridiculously close to his chest, which obviously made Granger laugh. 'I'm not going to steal it from you.'

'You couldn't, even if you wanted to.'

Granger eyed the pencils and eraser on the table. 'Drawing again?'

'None of your business Granger. Are you here with a purpose or just to annoy me? If so, mission accomplished. Now leave.'

'Of course I'm not here to annoy you. Wouldn't dream of it. No, I was wondering if you've seen Parkinson. But I do think that gracing you with my presence is slightly more entertaining then talking to your ex girlfriend, so I think I'll stay for a bit until you tell me what you're doing and why.'

Draco smirked nastily. If that was the way she wanted to play this game, then she could have it.

'I am not going to tell you what I was doing or why. But, I do have a question for you.' Could he ask it? He might spill this one chance he had. But if she took the bait, he might have his way. Was it work the risk? Or would he overplay his hand? 'What is this little thing Potter's hiding from his girlfriend? It obviously involves you.'

Granger's eyes went wide.

'Could it be? Did Potter actually sleep with someone else? You tell me Granger, I am dying to know.'

'Shut up Malfoy, obviously, and like usual, you have no idea what you're talking about. So what if Harry did? I bet everyone has a few flings before finding a real relationship.' A blush seemed to creep into her cheeks.

Draco laughed. 'Oh, you are good Granger. From the nonsense you just sprouted I can tell you are defending the poor, poor girl that had the misfortune to lay under Potter for a good 30 seconds. So, he really did cheat on his She-Weasel then? I always thought Potter and his principles were inseparable, but I guess that even the Boy-Who-Just-Wouldn't-Die has his flaws. So who was it?'

Granger seemed to get more nervous by the minute, fidgeting with a button from her blouse. 'Stop it Malfoy. Don't be ridiculous. Harry would never cheat on Ginny. Now, the real reason I am here: Where is Parkinson, I have to talk to her.'

'You don't think you'd be getting off that easy, do you?' Draco smirked. 'So, it was you. I didn't believe it when the thought first occurred to me, but now that I think about it. I'm sure you two make a lovely couple. But, the question is: why do you want to keep it a secret? Why can't the Weasels know? I'm sure they're not going to be happy when they find out about this.'

Granger looked more mortified by the second. 'It is a question of 'if' they find out, not when,' she mumbled.

Draco's jaw nearly dropped. They actually did it. Sure, he teased her, but he never believed that they really shagged. This was huge.

'So, what does it take to buy your silence?' she asked with a cranky face.

'Huh, what do you mean?' Draco shook out of his stupor. Why hadn't he thought of that.

'You know, the fact that you probably aren't going to keep quiet from the goodness of your heart? What do you want in return?'

Draco suddenly had a great idea. A stupid idea, but great. Would she be foolish enough to go along with it? His thoughtful expression changed into a devilish smirk. 'Well, there is this one thing. Stand up straight Granger.'

'What?' she asked confused.

'I said straight. Arms by your sides. Great, now turn around. Slowly.'

Granger hesitantly turned around, her uncertain face begging Draco not to make fun of her.

'Mmmm,' Draco mumbled as he took a good long look at her. 'Yes, you will do perfectly.'

'What are you talking about Malfoy? I swear do not mess with me. I could just as easily obliviate you and you won't remember shit about Harry or me.'

Draco grinned. 'There is a very easy way to keep me silent. It's very easy. At the most it'll take up a few hours but that is it. The question is, do you agree to it?'

'Agree to what?' Hermione snarled. It was really unattractive on a girl, just like Blaise had said.

'Model for me. You were right, I was drawing. I need a model. One that won't walk away any moment.'

Hermione grimaced. 'Is that all? Why not ask a friend? Why me?'

'You will do fine Granger. Besides, I'm sure your secret is worth a few hours in my room right?'

'Well, if that's all. Fine. I'll just go now.'

She was about to turn around and walk away, when Draco's voice stopped her dead in her tracks.

'You do understand that modelling is not about sitting at a table for two hours, pretending to study?'

Oh Merlin, he couldn't mean? She turned her head to look at him, the horror dawning on her face.

'What?' she choked.

'Naked Granger. Naked. It's not very educational to start on drawing fabrics when I can't even get anatomy right.'

Oh Merlin. No way. Hermione saw Draco grab his pencils and pad. 'I'll let you know when I require your services. Have a pleasant evening Granger.' Malfoy saluted her and left the library with a smirk.

Hermione buried her head in her hands. What had she gotten herself into?

On her way back to the common room she realized she still had no idea where Parkinson was.

A/N

I will not bore you with apologies or excuses. I just hope you like my story and if you have any thoughts about it, do leave a review. 3


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